“Shut the F$#@ Up!" was the mom's response as she sat in the principal’s office with her daughter who had their usual appointment with trouble that week. When asked by the principal to explain her actions, she was quickly met with a frustrated mom who was not trying to hear anything out of her daughter’s mouth. This is a very familiar scene for so many teenage girls in Chicago and all over the United States, which leads to them running to anyone that will listen; these voices need to be heard. Welcome to my world of Far’falla Girl an organization where girls come to talk, vent, yell, cry, laugh or sit quietly and listen. I know that last part just hit you. The concept of teenagers actually listening? Yes, when they get tired of talking and have run out of self-made and shorthanded solutions and are given the opportunity to express themselves; they will listen.
I realized girls needed more than just a Far’falla Girl class to say what is on their mind so, I created this blog. I realized WE want and need to be heard. Far’falla Girl began because of one girl. She was the virtue of my vision. This young lady had a lot going through her mind and weighing heavy on her heart yet, no one to turn to that would simply allow her to speak without judgment. I decided to be those available ears and kind heart. These girls’ stories are fueled by experience, emotion and enlightenment. Through their journey, they must have the chance to express themselves without a filter. This blog is not to control the way their story is told rather, allow the voices to be felt through the truths and raw expression.
Have you ever met a family and when you ask the kid how they are doing then, one parent quickly answers on behalf of them. Moments like that are the reasons our kids develop poor attitudes and difficulty communicating. Like those teenagers who develop a heavy breathing pattern when an adult addresses them. That type of body language alone can tell you something negative and unadvised is brewing in that adolescent mind. These young people have such brilliantly simple and complicated minds and it is common to brush them off with rules, requirements, standards that we deem "law", without understanding the whirlwind of emotions they encounter. The next time your friend with kids is over, tell them, "I know this generis nothing like our days but, we think we know and yet, we have no idea..." Ha! But, we shall learn and grow together!
This is a place where girls and young women can tell their story or share their life lessons. It’s a place where Sarah can share how her parents’ divorce affected her life, a place where Aidee can be honest about struggling with a mental illness while trying to make it through college, where Tyra realized her attitude was what was holding her back from success in life, where DeAsia can share her honest opinion about the picturesque experience of college (and how it's not so much)... This is a place where we take fabulous fashion looks from Freeform’s Grown-ish and show girls how to take that $700 outfit and find something inspired by it for under a $100. All of this is for the young yet maturing ladies! This is the place for seasoned women to share their recipes of life! Please, have a seat at the table. Let us propel girls to greatness by giving them life tools, real life experiences, and wisdom in order to reach it.
Bella Élite blog will give girls the opportunity to write in their issues, problems, concerns and prayer needs. Things our older crew have not experienced or felt and truths we may not understand because let’s face it a teenager in the 80’s/90’s is so different from today. “Fake Facebook News” has become our trusted guide into the lives and minds of teenagers rather than the root; the source of information for this generation which in fact is a teenager. The fantasies painted on Instagram or Snapchat and other social media outlets are mostly fictional and highly mythical. Those are the "escape lives" they are living. The places they go to escape reality and build a life they hope for. Yet here we are 30+ taking more time comparing every teenager to the one who made a bad decision, acted out of emotion, or committed a serious crime than getting to know the teenagers we see every day. I know for many it’s hard to believe but we actually have very wise, sweet, respectful teenagers that guard their integrity and uphold standards within their lives. They may have just ended up in the wrong place in life which at times is tied in with family lines through generations. I hope this blog challenges us to be a part of the change and not a part of the problem. We must do our part to reach the youth and possibly transform a life. These girls are important and so are their feelings. Just give them the space to SPEAK.
Dear Beautiful Butterfly,
This is a blog that aims to make you better, enrich your life, help you overcome hurdles and most importantly help YOU CONTROL THE NARRATIVE.
Bella Élite & Far’falla Girl